What is Mental Health?

May I talk to you about Mental Health. I will begin with depression then move to how we practice mental health. Please stick with me.

What is mental health? More importantly why should I talk to you about Mental Health? Because I am good at getting depressed. Really good. I am not talking about just getting a bit down, no that is amateur stuff. I am not talking about just feeling a bit off or lethargic. I mean deep clinical depression. I can get myself into a state where I feel miserable for long periods of time and until I can’t sleep or function. Life and my response to life’s challenges helped me to become an expert at getting depressed.

So, what is Depression?

Feeling down when something upsetting or stressful happens, like a relationship break-up, or losing a job, is normal, and usually the feelings fade over time and you get on with life. But if it’s depression the feelings don’t go away, even when things improve. Depression can often lead to thoughts that it’s not worth going on, or that everyone would be better off without you. This does not mean you are bad or weak. This means you are unwell. You are unwell in the same way someone who has asthma is having an asthma attack.

668 people were so unwell they chose death by suicide in the past year.

I very nearly was not here. I came so close to dying. So close to ending my life. From time to time my son Sam would ring up. He knows I would have episodes of depression and he asks, “How are you Dad? How’s the MADNESS…?” That is funny and very loving.

My son Sam accepted I had a mental health issue in the same way he would accept me having something like diabetes or deafness. You see what concerns me is not just the 668 people who committed suicide last year. It also the people who are still alive but living in a lonely desolate hell. No one in their right mind will kill themselves. In fact, it is pretty hard to die. Your ancestors have given you a strong survival instinct. It takes a great deal of work to shut this off. You can only shut the survival instinct off if you are unwell.

Let me paraphrase Dr Joe Dispensa who I highly recommend. You can find him on YouTube.

How many people believe in the idea that the way you think has some effect on your life that your thoughts are intimately connected to your future. Is that true? You think 60 to 70 thousand thoughts in one day out of those 60 to 70 thousand thoughts that you think in one day 90% of those thoughts are the same thoughts as the day before so if you believe that your thoughts are somehow connected to your life then the same thoughts always lead to the same choices, the same choices always lead to the same behaviours, the same behaviours create the same experiences, and the same experiences produce the same emotions and those very same emotions drive the very same thoughts and your biology your neural circuitry your neurochemistry your neural hormones and even your genetic expression is equal to how you think. This leads to how you act and how you feel and how you think how you act and how you feel.

This is called your personality and your personality creates your PERSONAL REALITY that’s it ! So, if you wanted to create a new personal reality, a new life then you would have to start thinking about what you’ve been thinking about. I will say that again, you would have to start thinking about what you’ve been thinking about.

Your amazing brain is run by a dumb robot. Look at your friends You may think that

“Yes your brain is definitely run by very dumb robots”

…But I have news for you. There is an element of your brain that is a dumb robot. We all do this, and I will illustrate. Let me show you what happens. If I make a mistake. If I stuff up…I may say to myself, “Andrew why am you so dumb why do you do such stupid things.” The dumb and obedient robot rushes off to search the memory banks for evidence to support your question. “Hey Andrew,” the robot says, “you remember when you were 14 and you put the shotgun shell in the vice and wanted to see what would happen if you hit it with a hammer. That was dumb!”.

“Hey Andrew, remember when you were 21 and were challenged to a motorbike race on the back streets of Birkenhead, Auckland and you lost control of the bike and crashed into a parked car” That was dumb

Hey Andrew, do you need any more evidence of how dumb you were.

Now If I were to ask my brain, the dumb robot for evidence of the things for which you I should be grateful and blessed. It will say, and note a different question.

“Tell me how I am blessed?”.

The dumb robot may then respond with “Hey Andrew, you have a healthy and strong body. You are still entering Jiu Jitsu competitions and you are old dude! (63 years old). Be very grateful”

How do we become mentally healthy? I am going to tell you 5 things you can do to stay mentally well. To change what you are thinking about you have to become aware of your unconscious thoughts. You need to observe them and pay attention to your automatic habits and behaviours and modify them. You need to look at the emotions you live by every single day that are connected to your past and decide if those emotions belong in your future.

You see most people try to create a new personal reality with the same personality and it doesn’t work you literally must become someone else. Your brain is organized to reflect everything you know in your life. Your brain is a record of the past it’s, an artefact of all the things you’ve learned and experienced to this moment.

So…if you wake up every morning and get out of bed on the same side shut the alarm clock off with the same finger, shuffle into the bathroom and use the toilet like you always do, go then get in the shower and wash yourself off in the same routine way, drive to work get to work see the same people that push the same emotional buttons. You do the same things that you’ve memorized and do so well? You then hurry up and go home, and hurry up and check your emails, and hurry up and check your Facebook, Instagram and twitter accounts then hurry up and go to bed.

Here’s my question did your brain change at all that day?

We could say that you were thinking the same thoughts performing the same unconscious actions living by the same emotions but secretly expecting your life to change. There is a principle in neuroscience (brain science) and the principal says nerve cells that fire together wire together so if you’re thinking the same thoughts making the same choices demonstrating the same behaviours reproducing the same experiences that stamp the same networks of neurons (connections in the brain) into the same patterns and then produce the same emotions you’re going to hardwire your brain into a very finite signature because as you fire and wire the same circuits in the same way those circuits begin to become more connected and by the time you’re 35 years old you have become who you are.

This is the science of how we become a set of memorized behaviours unconscious habits automatic emotional reactions beliefs and perceptions and even attitudes that function just like a computer program run by a dumb robot.

A habit is when your body knows better than your mind.

Therefore in my martial art, Jiu Jitsu we drill techniques over and over to avoid the slowness of thinking about what to do next.

When someone is trying to choke me unconscious, I do not want to be flicking through my memory banks thinking “Now what was the escape to that move again?

95% of most people’s behaviors attitudes thoughts beliefs emotional reactions are subconscious programs.

We cannot absorb all the information around us at once. We need to focus. We condition our brains to focus on key topics and the dumb robot reinforces our habits and beliefs.

I have a White Ford Ranger. When I was considering buying a Ford Ranger, I suddenly saw Ford Rangers wherever I went.

This is your homework. Look for how many Ford Rangers you see on the road. Just focus on Ford Rangers. You will see a great many Ford Rangers. This will also remind you to think about what you are thinking about and remember some key points from this talk.

Here are the five things you need to do to stay Mentally well. This is what you should focus on.

Be careful what you focus on and think about what you think about.

Here we go…

1. So first thing is Think about what you think about. Learn to calm your Mind. Learn how to meditate. This will help you to see what you think about. You will then be able to choose for example between being angry or noticing that you are becoming angry. A big difference. You will fire and wire emotional intelligence.

2. Focus on gratitude. Look for Ford Rangers, and Gratitude. This is Mental Health. Each morning write down three things for which you are grateful. This is Mental Health. You will fire and wire Gratitude.

3. Contact someone each day and tell them why you are grateful for them or perform a random act of kindness. We are looking for Ford Rangers and Kindness. This is mental Health. You will fire and wire Kindness.

4. Write in your journal about something positive or something you learned that day. This is mental health. You are firing and wiring positivity. If you are happy you are more creative and if you are more creative, you are happy now. Be careful of the ‘I will be happy when’ statement. I will be happy when I finish my study. I will be happy when I have paid off my car.Be happy now.

5. Exercise. Each day. This will release the happiness hormones of endorphins into your brain. Strengthen your heart and muscles and tell your brain that you love you and you care for you. Then eat good food. You are firing a wiring habits of health.

This is your amazing life. Get yourself organised before you get to 35 or you will need to work through a much harder change process. This is mental Health